Day 12 Be Kind Always

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09 Feb 2021

#mindfulness #kindness #lovingkindness #calm #present

It’s easy to find yourself in a situation where someone has either intentionally or unintentionally done something that has harmed you, and at that moment of hurt you just want to seek revenge. Whether it’s throwing a punch in return, or saying something back as mean as what was said to you, or even plotting a way to get back at them in the future. I’m sure we’ve all had moments like this.

Yesterday over family breakfast, grandma, as always, was talking about how mistreated by grandpa she was before he passed. My aunt quickly stopped grandma’s bantering and stated that to her, grandpa was the most perfect human being she has ever known. (Yes I know most perfect is grammatically wrong, but it is used here for effect. In Chinese, translates as 最完美) So naturally, she had to defend her statement as to why she thought grandpa was perfect.

Grandpa was a general doctor in a small village in Gansu province in his younger years. People in the village were poor and didn’t have the privilege to access proper health care. Grandpa was always helping the poor who couldn’t afford going to the doctor by giving them free consultations, and paying for the medication from his own pocket. While doing so, he had his own family to raise. He had 4 children and his mother to provide for as well. He knew very early on that the education in the village was not enough for his children, so he had then sent his four children all into the city to receive the best schooling possible. And this meant higher school fees, sending food and money to the family who took them in. But though circumstances were difficult, nothing stopped grandpa from performing actions of kindness to all. My uncle said he remembered once a poor man had come to grandpa with very little clothes on, and without hesitation, my uncle was ordered to give his clothes to the poor man. This was only two examples of many.

It’s not difficult to practice kindness. You just need to remember how happy and rewarding being kind to others makes you feel, and not think about how others will repay you for your act of kindness. When being hurt, don’t think about revenge, but of forgiveness. Maybe they are just going through a rough patch in their own lives. We will never know. Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.

第十二天：心存善意

你常常会发现自己被他人有意无意伤害到，而在这一伤心时刻你或许只想以牙还牙，比如重拳回击，粗口对喷或是暗中诅咒报复。我敢肯定我们每个人都经历过这样的瞬间。

昨天一起吃早饭时，姥姥又像往常一样谈起姥爷在去世前是如何虐待她的。小姨立刻打断了姥姥的苦水咕哝，并坚称姥爷是她所知最完美的人。因此自然而然地，她需要阐明姥爷的过人之处以证明自己观点的合理性。

姥爷年轻时是甘肃一个小山村里的一位普通医生。村里人普遍家境贫寒，更享受不到优质的医疗服务。可姥爷总是通过免费问诊和垫付药钱帮助那些看不起医生的穷苦人。要知道，姥爷同时还要养家糊口——上有老母，下有子女四人。

姥爷很早便认识到村里的教育远远不足以将子孙后代培养成才，因此当时他把姐弟四人全数送进城里最好的学校念书——即使这意味着更高昂的学费以及向接纳他们的寄宿人家汇钱送饭。

尽管时事艰辛，却没有什么阻止得了姥爷对所有人通行善举。小舅告诉我们，他还记得有一次一个衣不蔽体的穷汉敲响姥爷家的大门，而姥爷立刻毫不犹豫地命令小舅将自己的衣服送给那个穷汉——而这仅仅是众多例子中的一个。

践行善举并不困难，你只需要记住善待他人给你带来的欢乐与荣誉感，并不去多想这种善行会带来何种回报就可以了。在受到伤害时，不要追求报复，而要心系谅解。或许加害者自己只是在经历一段生命中的艰难岁月。对于他们的苦难行军，我们很可能永远无法一窥究竟。你遇到的每一个人都在经历一场不为你所知的殊死征战。

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